Tamrynn Huckabay Fett Red
Dress, White Tennies
“The red dress was a very good pick Adam, but she can’t wear her
white tennies with it. Go get her white slip-on shoes,” she said.
“Mom, she’d want to wear the tennies, and
no one will see them anyway. She can run faster to Jesus in the tennies. She can’t run
in her slip-ons,” I argued.
Annie hated slip-ons, but mom made her wear
them every time she wore her red dress. Every
Sunday she came down for breakfast in her red dress and white tennies with
tangled hair and sheet wrinkles on her face.
We would eat the cinnamon rolls Mom just pulled out of the oven.
Licking icing off our fingers, we uttered an occasional “ouch!”
because they were still too hot.
Mom would come in the dinning room wearing hot
rollers in her hair, holding a brush looking for Annie.
Finding her at the table in her red dress, Mom would tell her, “You
can’t wear that! You wore it last week, and your tennies do not match.” It
was part of the family’s Sunday morning routine.
Annie never argued.
She was the best of us. That’s
why it doesn’t seem fair, but I guess if I were Jesus I would rather have her
come to Heaven than Sam or me. Sam makes messes all the time, and I talk back
too much. Annie was always good. When Sam and I broke Mom’s china
doll playing football in the house, Annie never tattled. Mom cried when she saw the doll’s face glued back together,
and the missing foot. She thought
Annie had broken the doll playing with it, and sent her to her room after
scolding her, but Annie still did not tell.
She was the best little sister.
Annie never begged to wear her dress.
She took it off and finished her roll, wearing her slip while Mom fixed
her hair. The most she misbehaved
was making faces to Sam and me about the situation.
When Mom told me to pick a dress for Annie to
meet Jesus in, I knew that Annie would be upset if I didn’t choose the red
one, but I really wanted her to wear her tennis too.
She could run fast in them. Not
faster than me, but faster than Sam, and sometimes she could even beat Nick, our
next door neighbor. No one would
see her shoes anyway.
“Adam, I will not tell you again,” she was irritated with me now so I
figured I better obey.
I ran upstairs to get the shoes mom wanted.
She and Dad were going to meet with the pastor to talk about the funeral
on Tuesday. We didn’t to church
this morning because Mom and Dad were not feeling well.
I think they were too sad to be seen.
Annie had been sick for two years, and we
prayed for her to get better, but she never did.
The doctors said she wouldn’t, but we hoped for a miracle.
It was a miracle, but not the one we wanted.
We wanted to keep her, but instead Jesus took her before she got real
bad sick. I guess that’s a
miracle too.
On Tuesday Mom and Dad woke us up early and we had cinnamon rolls.
We never got cinnamon rolls on Tuesday, but I guess Mom made them because
we didn’t get any on Sunday, and because today was going to be a sad day.
“Adam get down here! We
have ten minutes to get to the church,” Dad called up the stairs.
My grandmother had come by and taken Mom and Sam to the church with her. I was in Annie’s room stuffing her tennies into my coat
pockets. She had a small foot and
my coat was huge. If I slouched, no
one would notice the shoes. It
wasn’t that cold out so I was praying Dad wouldn’t send me back up to get a
lighter jacket.
I was looking in the mirror when I heard
Dad’s footsteps on the stairs, “Coming Dad!”
I hollered as I ran out of Annie’s room.
“It’s not that cold out son. You are going
to get too hot.”
“Dad it’s always cold in the church.
If I get hot I’ll just take it off.” I said.
Dad was content.
We left.
There were a few words we did not say:
“grave,” “cemetery,” “burial,” and “funeral.”
It was like playing the game Taboo, where the player isn’t allowed to
say certain words that are associated with the main word that would make his
team mates think of the main word. I
think the main word was “dead.”
Annie was beautiful.
She looked just like Snow White. Her
coffin should have been made of glass, but I don’t think they really come like
that except in fairy tales. It was
pink, which looked good with her red dress.
When Dad and I got to the church only a few people were there.
Dad was hugging Mom, and they were crying loudly.
The church echoes. When the pastor is making a point, he says a word like
“sin,” or “love,” real loud, and then gets real quiet so that everyone
can hear the important word echo, over and over again.
I usually liked the echo, but not today.
“Annie, I brought you your tennies.
I know you already met Jesus, but you still might need them sometime.” I whispered as I shoved the shoes under the flowers she was
holding.
Grandma saw what I did. She
started walking towards me, and I thought she might scold me and make me take
the shoes out, but she just moved the flowers around to hide the shoes better.
Then bent over and kissed Annie’s forehead. I was glad she kissed her because I had felt silly talking to
her when I knew she couldn’t hear me, but she couldn’t feel Grandma’s kiss
either, and Grandma knew that.
“Do you think she is watching us from Heaven?” I asked Grandma.
“Maybe, but I am sure there is a lot for her
to do in Heaven.” Grandma said
brushing my hair with her hands.
“Like what Grandma?”
“Oh, Adam, she could swim in the crystal sea,
and sit on Jesus’ lap, and meet your grandpa,” Grandma moved toward
Annie’s pink box and said, “she will always have something to do in
Heaven.”
I looked back at Mom and Dad. Dad
was holding Mom up now, but they weren’t crying anymore.
People started coming in just like it was for church service.
Everyone we knew showed up, and some people I didn’t know came in
crying.
The pastor started talking, but I couldn’t listen to him.
My eyes were fixed on Annie. She
was here, but she was in Heaven too. She
looked bored here in her box, but Grandma said she has a lot to do in Heaven. Jesus
probably lets her run around bare-foot, so she doesn’t have to wear those
slip-ons. There isn’t any dirt on
the golden streets, and even if there was, no one would have to do the laundry
to clean her socks because God would just make them clean.
I wonder if she is allowed to draw with chalk on the golden streets. We are not allowed to play with any of Mom’s fancy jewelry.
When she accidentally leaves it on the kitchen counter after washing
dishes we are suppose to tell her, but not bring it to her.
Sam accidentally dropped her wedding ring down the drain one time, and
Dad had to take the entire sink apart to find it. Sam is clumsy.
If the entire street is made of gold in Heaven it is surely more
expensive than Mom’s jewelry, but I don’t think God cares about gold that
much. He loves children and
wouldn’t want them to worry about making a mess.
Annie’s probably decorating all of the streets in heaven just like she
did at our house. The chalk
pictures Annie drew for Mom on the driveway disappeared, but maybe when she
draws pictures for God they stay for eternity.
Maybe God will let her help to paint the sunset
tonight. She is new in Heaven, and
we always have to be extra nice to the new kids in class.
If she asks sweetly He might let her paint the entire thing.
We
always watched the painter on TV when we got home from school. He showed us how
paint sunsets so I know she could do a good job.
I will know if she paints it because she always used purple in her water
color sunsets, even though God doesn’t do that very often. Purple was her
favorite color. If He lets her
paint the sunset she will use a lot of purple.
Annie and I used to go to the lake and skip
rocks. I tried to teach her, but
she always complained that it was too hard.
She would feed the ducks instead, but she can probably do it now.
King
David is probably skips rocks with her on the crystal sea.
I’m sure he’s a better teacher than me.
Annie needs a good teacher because her rocks never skipped more than
twice. If David lets her use his
smooth rocks, I bet she can get at least four skips.
The rocks I found for Annie were just regular rocks, but the rocks David
has are cool because they came from God.
When Annie is tired of skipping rocks, David
probably takes her to see Joshua. Joshua
can build blocks and legos with her like Sam and I used to do.
Annie always built castles for her Barbie dolls, and then Sam would knock
them down. Sometimes it was by
accident and sometimes on purpose. When
it was on purpose, she would get angry. I
would tell on Sam for Annie, but before Dad got upstairs to scold him Annie
wasn’t upset anymore.
“We are playing sweet, Daddy.
It’s okay,” she would tell him.
Then Dad scolded me for being a tattle-tale. Joshua
has a whole army that probably knocks down her castle on purpose like he did to
Jericho, but he wouldn’t ever get in trouble for it because he doesn’t have
to touch the her castle, just walk around it.
Since Joshua was good, I am sure he would help her to rebuild it again.
That’s what I did when I sent my G. I. Joes to attack her Barbie land.
She liked animal more than she liked blocks,
and Noah might take her to the Ark to see the animals any time she wants to go.
Every time it’s her turn to pick our Saturday activity we had to go to
the zoo. The gorilla at our zoo
just had a baby so that is her favorite exhibit.
In Heaven all the animals would be nice so she could actually pet them.
The entire zoo would be like the petting zoo, and not just with goats and
donkeys. Not even the lions in Heaven are mean.
Annie always fixed the mane on her pet lion, Leo, and since she had to
leave him here Noah probably lets her braid the mane on the real lion.
The lion won’t get upset if she pulls out a tangle because in Heaven he
can’t feel pain. She could sleep
with the lions too because they sleep with the lambs and the lambs would be
really comfortable to cuddle with.
I think God has a special cloud for her to
sleep on. The angels probably tuck
her in and sing her to sleep. It would be easy to sleep on a cloud because they
are so soft, but if Annie missed us or just wasn’t sleepy, God would send her
an angel with a harp. The angels
sing “Holy, Holy Holy,” like they do in church, but they probably know other
songs too. Annie can teach them new
songs if they don’t know any.
“If everyone will stand up please we will
sing Amazing Grace,” the pastor said.
I feel better now knowing that Annie isn’t
sad or bored in Heaven, but I will miss having her here on Earth.
“She is lovely in her red dress, and no one saw her white tennies,”
Grandma said to me as we left the church.
“If anything ever happens to me Grandma, will
you make sure I get my tennies?”
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