LITR 3731: Creative Writing
Student Drama Submission 2003

Giselle Hewitt

Thank God for Scantron

Concept sentence:  College students invent their own techniques for taking a very difficult exam.

Characters: 
Dr. White
Jennifer
Corrie
Jason
Will
Enrique
Reani
Kelly  

Scene:  Students anxiously wait for the exams to be passed out.

Dr. White:  Here are the exams as I promised, please remove all bookbags, loose paper and any other objects from your desk, except for your scantrons and a #2 pencil.  Feel free to ask me any questions, unless you are asking for the answer.  (pauses and looks around the room)  Remember to read each answer all the way through before choosing, and bubble in the answer completely. 

(Dr. White passes out exam, then walks to the chalkboard and writes “1 hour”)

Jennifer:  (looks over at Corrie and takes a deep breath) Here we go. 

(all students look down at their exams)

Corrie:  #1… Which of the following are NOT sociological implications found in Weber’s The Protestant Ethic and the Spirit of Capitalism?  hmmm… maybe I should have read that...

Will:  Eeeny, meenie, minie, mo…. Damn, how did the rest of that song go?

Reani:  (staring off into space) If he doesn’t lecture afterwards… maybe I’ll be able to get groceries, before picking up the kids

Enrique:  #7… Which of the following comments were made by Max Weber?  A:  "A man does not 'by nature' wish to earn more and more money…” B:  "Waste of time is thus the first and in principle the deadliest of sins…” (scoffs)  that’s funny… C: "No one knows who will live in this iron cage in the future…” (shakes head and stares blankly at the test in front of him)

Jennifer:  D: a and c, but not b… E:  all of the above (sighs and puts head in hands)

Kelly:  (looking at scantron) hmmm… that was the fourth D in a row… maybe I should change one of these

Will:  (staring at pencil) I wonder if he’ll let me go sharpen my pencil again.

Jason:  (flips arm over and looks at it) Man, why did I take a shower this morning? (glances over at the students exam next to him)

Dr. White:  (clears throat and looks at Jason) Let’s all keep in mind the University’s honor code…

Enrique:   (sarcastically) “Man does not by nature wish to make more and more money”, so why would students be here torturing themselves with exams on Max Weber?

Jennifer:  B, B, A… C… ummm E… yeah, I haven’t had an E in a while

Dr. White:  40 minutes remaining class

Reani:  Pay the phone bill today, house payment Friday, car and insurance next Tuesday…

Corrie:  (turns the page of the test, and smirks) yeah, True or False – Use A for True, and B for False… #26 Weber believed that rational action within a system of rational-legal authority is at the heart of modern society…. What?  (scratches head)

Jason:  (scribbling on desk) 50 questions, 2 points each… I need a 72 to pass… so that is… (pauses) 36… I need to get 36 right

Jennifer:  D, A, A, B… C…

Kelly:  (slowly filling in bubbles on scantron)  I wonder what happens if the bubble isn’t filled in all the way…

Will:  If half the exam consists of 5 possible answers, then how many would I get correct if I answered C on all of them 

(Dr. White goes to chalkboard erases “1 hour” and writes “25 min.” on the board)

Reani:  (looks up at the chalkboard) Shit! I haven’t even started.  (looks back down and frantically skims the questions and fills in the scantron)

Jennifer:  (smiles) Good, I’m done! Thank God for Scantron.

(Jennifer and Corrie stand and take their exams to the front of the room and hand them to Dr. White.  They then turn to walk toward the door together)

Corrie:  (whispers) How did you do?

Jennifer:  (shrugs) we’ll see when we get them back.

(Both students exit the room)

Theme Sentence:  Test taking can be anxiety provoking whether you know the answer or not.