Pauline Chapman

Immigrants from South Korea, Mexico, and Iran tell their stories

Ever since college a significant number of my friends have been from other countries, either as immigrants or temporary residents.  Getting has to know them has made history, geography, politics, religion, and culture personal and alive.  This assignment gave me the opportunity to get to know some local people I knew as friendly acquaintances, but wanted to know better.  I would characterize my conversations with them up to this point to be friendly small talk, and I had not been to their homes. This first group is in their mid to late fifties and their children are at least in high school, if not college or the workforce.  How would informal interviews compare with the immigrant narratives from class lectures and readings?  Some of the main questions I asked were, why they came, why they chose to stay, what was it like adjusting to America, and finally, who are they now?

Kim immigrated from South Korea in 1969, the bride of an American G.I., and therefore had an easy path to citizenship.  Her father had died in the Korean War and even though they were not a poor family, her mother thought the family would be better off if Kim's Aunt married a newsman who spoke English well, so they would have a man to take care of the extended family finances.  Instead of helping, he used the money primarily for himself.  Kim did benefit from him indirectly as he introduced her to her husband.  She didn't know any English, most of her schooling preparing her to be a good wife.  Today is different there and girls have more choices than she did.  She didn't have a TV, but everyone knew America was a good place from word of mouth.  Her new husband told her she didn't need to bring anything to America--America has everything. She quickly found that wasn't true when his used car broke down when he picked her up.   They lived in Louisiana with his parents to save money, but the mother-in-law was jealous because Kim catered to her father-in-law and he liked it.  Kim explained she was just treating him with respect because he was an elder.  Kim also tried taking classes, but quit so she could start working and making money.  In the early years, she and her husband didn't see much of each other, working different shifts so one of them would be at home with the children and wouldn't have to pay a babysitter.  "Working hard" seems to be her answer for everything, along with "it's not just how much you make, it's how you use it."  She buys and rents houses, and knows how to work the system to get the best deal.  She says, women have to get power by going around, sideways.  Their daughter is in her final year of medical school and they've paid her way fully.  The children don't speak Korean.  From their photos, the children don't look Asian, intermarriage insuring a more rapid assimilation. She readily admits to being a Republican, saying the Democrats use poor people to get power.  When I asked if she experienced prejudice, she said there is prejudice everywhere--it's a personal problem--ignorance or fear.  When asked if she thought of herself as American, she said "half half" at first, at which I suggested "Korean American," which she liked.   ("Half half" is how one of the characters in Gish Jen's The Love Wife describes herself.)

Hector first crossed the Texas/Mexico border with a "coyote" in 1970 when he was 17, coming for one reason:  work.  He had borrowed the money from his relatives and it took only about two months to pay them back.  He later married and had his children in Mexico, but continue to cross over for work.   He would routinely come on a tourist visa, but stay to work.  Like Kim, his education was limited, maybe 5 or 6 years, but he managed to get a valid Social Security Card, a Texas Driver's License, a car and insurance, and recently bought a house--all without a green card.  He's in his fifties and starting to get information about receiving Social Security.  He says in Texas it is easy.  California, where most of his relatives live, is more difficult.  When asked if it were difficult adjusting to life in the U.S., he laughed and said, "no, it's better here!"  When asked, he said he didn't experience prejudice.  His wife and children live here now.  He is obviously proud of his three children and tells me they are bilingual, except for the one who is trilingual---he knows American Sign Language.  It's much more expensive and dangerous now to get across the border, and Hector hasn't been back to Mexico in seven years.  He says there's nothing left there for him, this is his home.  He sees himself as a Mexican-American, and hopes that the law will grant him amnesty someday.

In 1982, Azar and her husband brought their five year old daughter Lili to Boston for an eye operation.  They decided to stay to give their daughter better opportunities.  Azar said it can be difficult, but that's why you need a reason.  Their son Jamshid, who was born in the U.S. and attends Clear Lake High, sat in on the interview.  All they had taken with them from Iran was two suitcases.  Both parents had college degrees, but because Azar was a translator and spoke English, she was the first to work, while her husband stayed home with their daughter.   They had a variety of jobs in the beginning, later owning a gas station, which they recently sold.  Her favorite part of the business was interacting with the customers.  She hasn't had any problems with prejudice here, and finds people in this area to be friendly.  The family appears to be comfortably assimilated to America, but they also get together with the Iranian community with whom they can share their customs, religion, and language.  Both children speak Farsi as well as unaccented English.  She mentioned Rumi as one of the poets she'd like Jamshid to know.  She wears typical casual American clothes and no veil, because what is important is what is inside, that she is faithful to her husband, not the outside appearance.  Lili is working on her PhD in International Law and is currently on a trip to Iran with a human rights group.  Azar said she encouraged her children to take advantage of opportunities and do well, but the choices are up to them, and Jamshid agreed that his mother didn't push them too hard.  Azar hesitated on the question of where she considers her home, because even though this is her home, she still very much cares about the Iranian people.  It is obvious that she is divided, so she preferred "Iranian-American" to "American."

Kim, Hector, and Azar came to this country with very little and have seen their dreams realized both in material and human terms.  I noticed many  similarities with the immigrant narrative we've studied in class.  In Kim's story there is the conflict of old world with new world traditions, the shock of arrival and finding circumstances less prosperous than expected, assimilation issues with the mother having to learn English and the children only learning English, and traits of the "model minority" with the success in business and the daughter in medical school.  Both Kim and Hector are practical and resourceful, the hardworking first generation.  It is interesting how much the "model minority" and the "ambivalent minority" can have in common.  Azar and Kim have interesting similarities and differences.  They are both women from traditionally male dominated cultures, both had to work while their husbands shared childrearing duties, both worked for themselves and have been successful, both have daughters pursuing advanced degrees.  But there seems to be a single-mindedness to Kim and a balance to Azar.  I want to believe it's from Azar's education and exposure to literature.  In the written narratives we've studied, the authors initiated their stories. The strong feelings we see in the written word motivated the authors to express themselves.  In the interviews I was somewhat surprised there wasn't more drama associated with leaving their countries and assimilating to America, but they were asked to participate in an interview, they did not initiate the process.  They appear to focus on the positive and not dwell on the negative, which is a useful skill in making such a challenging change.  Time and success could also be factors in softening the memories.  What they lacked in drama they more than made up in graciousness and inspiration. 

In the end, I know my question was too broad.  I need to focus on a single issue, and ask more follow-up questions on the single issue.